Almost 1/2 of my family going Vietnam today.....they will only be back next year....sob sob...can't join them.....very sad! I actually yearn to join them in the tour... think it's going to be very fun to be out of singapore with the family (guess to be crowd can lead to arguments too!). Anyway its really a rare opportunity to travel in such a big group. The first patch left today (including mum & dad, bro & family, & LY). The second patch will leave 23 Dec (including TC & family, Bt & family). Hope mum & dad can take this opportunity to improve their relationship a little bit. I really dun want them to come back quarrelling....

My feelings are really mixed! Happy to see them going for tour in a family together but sad that i can't join them. If not for my situation (you know what i mean), i would have join them in all occassions. I love with my family, i love to play with the kids. Yet the world is simply so contradicting. the more you love to do something, the more the situation stops you from doing it. Dunno when got the chance to join them in a tour again??

Think mum miss me too! B4 she left this morning, she has me to drop by her place. buy 4d for her during her absence...and passed me $100 in case i got $$ problem. Dunno when can i stop her from worrying for me....think she feel very heartpain that i cannot join them for tour too! Anyway, wish them have a fun time there!

Joel is slightly better now but not fully well yet. Appetite is still bad. He just want to drink water. and at times just take cereal. no rice for him. can't sleep well at night. Our little prince, get well soon. Each time you fall sick, mummy & daddy fall sick mentally too! Our hearts ache so much each time you suffer. How i wish someone invent a machine that can transfer the pain from one person to another....or better still stop the pain by pressing the button??

Its end of the year again! Everywhere is filled with holiday mood and Christmas joy.... i have no feeling. no joy for me. no life for me. i wonder what's my purpose in life? Why am i breathing for the sake of breathing? Why am i going thru the same life day after day? Why my life is filled with pain and anxiety more than joy and happiness? Think the only joy i have is when i see joel well and healthy. When i see him smile...that's happiness. Maybe that's the limit given to me in terms of happiness! Oh oh...here i go grumbling again! better dun spoil other's mood.

See them again next year 2007!!!